Jokes about lists.

May 23, 2013 ... He just, uh, got away from us"; what he meant was that George escaped. When Buster loses his left hand: "He's all right." The list goes on.

Jokes about lists. Things To Know About Jokes about lists.

In today’s fast-paced world, finding ways to stay entertained is more important than ever. Whether you’re looking for a quick laugh during your lunch break or want to lighten the m...Help, I’ve fallen and I can’t giddy up. You’ll laugh out loud at these other corny jokes about animals. 54 / 85. Nicole Fornabaio/Rd.com. An apple a day really can keep the doctor away ...Lists · Jokes · About · Submit · Log In. Funny Lists. Short, punchy comedy for readers on the go. New humor lists regularly. Quizzes | Submit a List &mi...Utah. An elderly Mormon visits his doctor and asks if he’ll live to be a hundred. “Do you smoke or drink?” asks the doctor. “Those things have never and will never touch my lips,” says ...3. By the time you’re wise enough to watch your step, you’re too old to go anywhere. 4. A diplomatic man remembers his wife’s birthday but not her age. 5. Congratulations on being able to cough, fart, sneeze, and pee at the same time. 6. My doctor told me to start exercising so I joined aerobics for seniors.

Dive into our compilation of the best Country Jokes that promise a chuckle from every corner of the world! Whether it’s the witty humor from Australia or the whimsical giggles from Brazil, we’ve gathered a diverse collection to tickle your funny bone. Curious about what makes a Kenyan lion roar with laughter or why a Swiss flag is amusing?

3 nurses walk into a patient's bedroom only to find him dead. The first nurse goes to check on him and notices that he had a massive erection so she tells the other nurses to give him a good send off by have sex with him. The first nurse does it and stops after getting tired. The second does the same and stops to share with the third nurse.

Jan 13, 2022 ... The best jokes ever performed soon become iconic classics, and there is no better iconic joke than a one-liner. We've compiled a list of the ...Idea jokes are a testament to the human capacity for creativity and wit. By connecting seemingly unrelated concepts and delivering unexpected punchlines, these jokes tap into our sense of humor in a unique way. They challenge us to think outside the box and appreciate the cleverness that can be found in everyday situations.Tom Brady took some major hits when he was roasted by his former teammates, comedians and even Kim Kardashian during Netflix’s “The Greatest Roast of … International researchers examined more than 1,000 jokes (from across the world wide web) and narrowed them down to a list of 50, and then 36,000 people voted. We love the Joke of the Day and organizations that use the Joke of the Day as a way to create a humor culture, so here are the top 10 funniest jokes ever told that you can use for your ... 1 reranks. Voting Rules. Vote up any funny joke about lawyers and attorneys. Lawyers are allegedly the worst. They’re mainly (not really) only necessary as the butt of a good joke. Speaking of which, this is a list of the funniest lawyer jokes ever. The puns, one liners, and foibles on this list not only serve as a trenchant critique of the ...

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1. Why don’t they play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs. 2. What did the frustrated cat say? Are you kitten me right meow. 3. What kind of tea is hard to …

The Funniest Office Jokes And One Liners About Work. Jokes about the workplace, office politics, working, jobs, bosses, desks, etc. List of office jokes and humor, culled from TV shows, films, stand-up comedy and pop culture. These one-liners and humorous anecdotes look at office humor from a variety of perspectives, and try to find humor in ...Mar 13, 2024 ... 101 likes, 7 comments - dannybraff on March 13, 2024: "Exhaustive List Of Costco Jokes #comedy #standup #costco #jokes".List of fat jokes and humor, culled from TV shows, films, stand-up comedy and pop culture. These one-liners and humorous anecdotes look at fat jokes from a variety of perspectives, and try to find humor in wry observations, through irony and sarcasm, and even just by being silly. Human beings love...I bought my skeleton a new plant to say sorry for all the skeleton jokes I’d been making. He absolutely loves his bone-sai tree. The skeleton couldn’t look at the spare ribs I was making. He didn’t have the stomach for it. The skeleton wanted to start a fight on Halloween. He had a bone to pick with the werewolf.List of fat jokes and humor, culled from TV shows, films, stand-up comedy and pop culture. These one-liners and humorous anecdotes look at fat jokes from a variety of perspectives, and try to find humor in wry observations, through irony and sarcasm, and even just by being silly. Human beings love...

List of Jokes about Penguins . 1. Why don’t penguins like talking to strangers at parties? They find it hard to break the ice. 2. What do you call a penguin in the desert? Lost. 3. Why did the penguin cross the road? To prove he wasn’t a chicken. 4. What do you call a group of penguins at the North Pole? Lost tourists. 5. Why don’t ...Idea jokes are a testament to the human capacity for creativity and wit. By connecting seemingly unrelated concepts and delivering unexpected punchlines, these jokes tap into our sense of humor in a unique way. They challenge us to think outside the box and appreciate the cleverness that can be found in everyday situations.166 list jokes and hilarious list puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about list that are clean and suitable for kids and friends. This article provides a comprehensive list of jokes organized in alphabetical order. Whether you are looking for a bucket list, honey do list, Christmas list, or grocery list joke, this article has it all!Five Guys. Me: “Go to bed, the cows are already asleep in the field.”. Son: “So what?”. Me: “It’s pasture bedtime.”. What do you call a Frenchman in sandals? Philippe Philoppe. “I bought the world’s worst thesaurus yesterday. Not only is it terrible, it’s terrible.”. Why did the scarecrow get an award?Checklists Puns. The quality of education is so poor today that some people don't even know the difference between a checklist and a ticklist! Checklist: a tool for ensuring coverage of a subject can be completed with a check mark of some form, for instance, a cross, a tick, etc. Ticklist: someone who is tickling you.Welcome. Tuesday, May 14, 2024. You don't stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing! GCFL is an acronym for the G ood, C lean F unnies L ist. GCFL.net is a web page and mailing list for distributing one GOOD, CLEAN joke a day, five days a week, for free! We hope you will enjoy a joke in the morning before the ...

I am over 18. Meet your newest employee. My salary shall be 5000 bucks. (TKZS = a state-run commie collective farm.) A man walks in the TKZS' boss office and says: "Meet your newest employee. My salary shall be 5000 bucks." The boss laughs straight at his face: "Comrade, the average salary here is 150 bucks. I don't make 500.

A white Christmas! *** Great joke for adults: whales at sea ***. A male whale and a female whale see a fishing boat – the male whale recognized the ship that caught his dad whale a year ago. He asks the female whale “let’s both get under the boat, blow air out of our air holes, and it might topple the ship.”.65 lists jokes and hilarious lists puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about lists that are clean and suitable for kids and friends. Discover hundreds of funny jokes in our extensive database and directory of humorous names. Browse through our lists of jokes to find the perfect joke for any occasion.Honest Brand Slogans. Hallmark: “When you care enough to give a card mass-produced by a corporation.”. Ritz crackers: “Tiny, edible plates.”. CliffsNotes: “They’re still going to know ...The Greatest Rodney Dangerfield Jokes & One-Liners, Ranked. Jack Napier. Updated March 24, 2020 25 items. Ranked By. 3.2K votes. 440 voters. To many comedy enthusiasts, there was no greater stand-up than Rodney Dangerfield. He first grew in popularity during the 1960s and '70s as he would regularly appear on late-night talk show circuits.This list contains 30+ of the best black jokes about black people (racist, no limits, and dark humor) that you’ll ever hear. Racist black jokes; Funny black jokes; Best black jokes; Racist black jokes. What’s white on top and black on the bottom? Society. Why do a lot of black people stink? So that blind people can hate them.A German walks into a bar and asks for a martini. The bartender asks, “Dry?”. The German replies, “Nein, just one.”. Explanation: “Drei”—pronounced “dry”—is German for “three ...One Liner Ugly Jokes. You’re so ugly; when you walk into a haunted house, you come out with an application form. People say beauty is only skin deep. Thank goodness I’m ugly to the core! I’m so ugly, my reflection said, “Nope, not dealing with this today,” and walked away. I told my parents I wanted to be a model.Every good joke has two essential components: the setup and the punchline. The Setup. The setup of a cat joke sets the stage for the punchline. It provides the necessary context or scenario that creates anticipation in the listener. For example, a classic cat joke setup might involve a cat attempting a daring feat or being in a humorous situation.

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The best jokes about aging skewer the aspects of growing older that are tough for everyone to accept; the slowing down of the body, the rapid advancement of a world that feels like it's moving forward without you, and of course, looking older. When a person can find the comedy in a difficult reality, it's safe to say they've reached a mature …

It doesn’t matter if you need some snappy comebacks for your next boring math lecture or simply want something amusing after a long day at work – these jokes will surely hit the spot. So grab your calculator (or abacus if that’s more your style) and let’s dive into this hysterical list together! List of Jokes about Numbers . 1. Being a dad isn’t purely biological. Sure, one prerequisite of fatherhood is to actually have children, but there’s also a psychological aspect all true dads share: the love of the...Obese po. A Filipino woman and her husband, an American, wake up the morning after their wedding and decide to take a shower together. In the middle of their fun, the water cuts out. The wife cries out, “Ay! Walang tubig!” (“Oh no! No water!” in Tagalog).35+ Racist Jokes. “Can comedians joke about anything?” is an important question of today. In today’s times, people are pressurized to use inclusive language to appease others. This is mainly due to the rise of the Woke and Cancel Culture—especially in the West. A word that is considered appropriate a few years ago might be considered a ...AndrewsMcMeel). She is also a “calendar queen” having written over 20. She has been nominated for both an Emmy and Writers Guild award. Thefullwiki.org has listed Marnie Macauley on their list of top Jewish_American writers, dead or living. (She’s still deciding which.) She was also chosen as a Distinguished Woman in Nevada in March of 2014.4. The youth pastor walked toward us as we gathered in the church lot for the youth group service. “I’m sorry,” he said. “The only thing left is the donuts.”. 5. After the donuts were finished, the youth pastor went to the podium and began teaching. He reminded us, “Let us hold to our confection – er, confession.I have a joke about time travel, but you guys didn’t get it. I have a joke about being an electrician, but it’s too shocking. I have a joke about hunting for fossils, but you probably wouldn ...1. There. 2. Are. 3. No. 4. Bad. 5. Dog. 6. Breeds. 7. Only. 8. Bad. 9. Owners. 10. Chihuahuas. upvote downvote report. This joke may contain profanity. 🤔. I am over 18. A …There you have it, a whole warren of rabbit jokes to tickle your funny bone. Whether you came for a giggle or brought your own jokes to share, I hope you had a hopping good time! If you want to hear more funny animal jokes then check out these other great lists of jokes: Dinosaur jokes; Duck puns; Beaver jokes for; Deer jokesThe horse says, "You read my mind." How did people see in the dark during medieval times? They used knight lights. Why aren't there a lot of jokes about peaches? …From clean knock-knock jokes and the top corny jokes to hilarious one-liners and clever riddles, we've got the jokes guaranteed to bring on serious laughs. Short Jokes Anyone …

Here are some great poop joke one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about poop. Poop is a crap palindrome. When bears poop in the forest, the smell is un-bear-able. They said pooping is a call of nature. So is farting a missed call. Parent’s truth: The further you are from the bathroom, the more urgently your kid needs …Never criticize someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you'll be a mile away, and you'll have their shoes. Two men meet on opposite sides of a river. One …All I want is to spend a nice, quiet day with someone else’s family. Every Father’s Day, Dad gives Mom a big kiss and whispers in her ear, “You’re sitting in my …Instagram:https://instagram. fly new york to ireland Nov 5, 2021 · 71. “Buffet” is a French word that means “get up and get it yourself.”. 72. Winter: the season when we try to keep the house as hot as it was in the summer, when we complained about the ... pie tap Hurting you is the last thing I want to do… but it's still on the list. RELATED: 152 Funny Short Jokes That Guarantee a Laugh. Good Roasts That Rhyme. Leka Sergeeva/Shutterstock. Everybody knows that you're stupid… thought you could fall in love because you saw a fake Cupid. aldi shopping online Ge-om-e-try! (Gee, I’m a tree!) 12. Teacher: Why are you turning in a blank sheet of paper? Student: Because all my answers are imaginary numbers. 13. Student One: I saw my math teacher with a piece of graph paper yesterday. Student Two: She must be plotting something. 14. room organizer A pirate walks into a bar with a paper towel on his head. He orders a bottle of rum. The bartender gives it to him and ask the pirate if that's a new hat on his head. The pirate laughs and tells the bartender, "No matey that's where they put the bounty on me head!" – Gray Starling; Pfafftown, NC. paper scissors rock game The old folks home was very secure. Each door was guarded by a century. You may be old, but I don't carrot all. Be kind to your children, because when you get older, they're the ones who are going to choose your nursing home. Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth. natural history smithsonian Welcome. Tuesday, May 14, 2024. You don't stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing! GCFL is an acronym for the G ood, C lean F unnies L ist. GCFL.net is a web page and mailing list for distributing one GOOD, CLEAN joke a day, five days a week, for free! We hope you will enjoy a joke in the morning before the ... I've grouped some classics (and new funnies) in familiar categories for easy selection, and put together a large group of 100 side-splitting funny clean jokes. In this Hub, you can look forward to having access to: "Chicken crossing the road" jokes. Animal jokes. PG-rated religion jokes. Knock knock jokes. Computer jokes. Husband and wife jokes. the other america Funny Short Jokes To Make You Laugh. You won’t miss an opportunity to make someone laugh with these corny good jokes. They are short and easy to …A German walks into a bar and asks for a martini. The bartender asks, “Dry?”. The German replies, “Nein, just one.”. Explanation: “Drei”—pronounced “dry”—is German for “three ... jobs in india Joke has 80.16 % from 2013 votes. More jokes about: Hitler, jewish, racist. A Pakistani boy took admission in an American school... Teacher: "Whats your name?" Boy: "Nadir" Teacher: "No, now you are in America, your name is Johnny from today." Boy went home and his mother asked: "How was the day Nadir?"Guests Jokes. This joke may contain profanity. 🤔. I am over 18. A woman arrived at a party. While scanning the guests there, she spotted an attractive man standing alone. So she approached him, smiled and said politely, "Hello, my name is Carmen." "That's a beautiful name", he replied, "Is it a family name?" itv x Jun 19, 2014 ... I've been asked if I can try to perfect my joke-telling skills. So here I am, accosting strangers with a list of gags. I agreed to the challenge ... jump comics manga Conclusion: math jokes for kids. Math doesn’t have to be boring. Incorporating the best math jokes into your lessons can make them more fun and memorable! A study from the National Association of Independent Schools suggests that “by high school, 40 to 60 percent of youth are disengaged.” More importantly, “student … dallas to oklahoma city 2. Sam Jay. Often the funniest jokes are the ones you don’t see coming, and a first-time roaster going in on Drew Bledsoe was phenomenal. Jay’s “too Black for …From the best clean jokes for adults to funny clean jokes of the day, this big SFW list has something hilarious for everyone: kids, teens, seniors and co-workers.